La Mort de Marat, by Jacques-Louis David

This post is solely dedicated to the soldier who committed suicide today on a watch-post of an army camp in Larnaca, Cyprus.

Fact: The young recruited soldier unwrapped the taped case containing ammo for his weapon, a G3, loaded the gun, placed it between his mouth and fired. He was found dead on the watch-post today. Another life lost for no reason, of a defensive army that hasn’t been in war, or a war-like situation, for 35 years now.

Personal interpretation: Regardless of the troubles he might have been having, individual problems or weakness of character, it is a clear and blunt statement – a cry, if you will, of desperation for the Society to finally listen. We don’t want to make war, we don’t want to be recruited anymore, we don’t want to waste anymore time or lives of young men, in order to pay for mistakes and events of a past era, deeds of another generation. Please, listen.

And what should one do?

7…

What should one do when he’s being strapped down on the hospital bed, (6…) too fond of reality to allow any form of sedation, while everything that matters, all that is dear from him, will be ripped off him in a few seconds?

5..

What can one do? The pain, the anguish, the fear.. – 4.. – and then the involuntary hope of finding a way to maybe prolong the time when the syringe finally makes contact, that you know is false and also pointless. Because the worst part is the waiting – for it only provides you with time, 3. Time which gives you the luxury to think, to visualize every possible outcome – two.! – the worst-case scenario; time which promotes fear, despair and -

You may have missed it right there… but time’s up.

Crimson Echo, by Michael Michaelides

The echo of her laughter in his thoughts, a chime of purest energy – the slash of a knife… She was here now, a blurred figure in the empty space left in his mind, delving the blade deeper and deeper, drowning him in a lake of sorrow and despair. 

“I have to go… I… I can’t stay any longer; I have to leave – we talked last night… You understand, right?”

The knife had been dipped into bile before she impaled him with it. It seems she was fixed upon a most painful, excruciating death for the monster lurking inside him. Here was the echo again, accompanied by a perfect crimson this time, filling his eyes. A slow smile started to spread – a weak, broken smile, that carried with it more pain and anguish than the greatest flood of tears.

“Heh – yeah, sure…”

What a fool! A fool indeed! Even Shakespearean characters carried more prudence!

“They’re calling – I have to go, we’ll talk!”

The water started sipping through the mouth, filling as it went his lungs – he literally did have to leave. Consciousness was abandoning him, his senses giving in to this overwhelming feeling of purposelessness, of futility. As he pulled out the knife, he screamed, and all the water that got inside started pouring out from his eyes- don’t worry though, no dying… just a hole left behind as the bile was eating through him; and an echo.

Nudogram, by Floris M. Neusüss

M’ afises… m’ afises na fygw – glystrisa stin pyrini lelapa tou theou iliou;

k twra? twra ti na ginei?

Pethainw; pethainw, siga siga, me tis glwsses tis fwtias na eksaylwnoun to kormi mou; tin zwogono vroxi na eksilewnei tin kardia mou..

- To ikseres etsi den einai?

- egw..

- ΣΚΥΛΛΑ! to ikseres, ma tipote.. euxaristw! S’ euxaristw poly.. 

- Ase me… άσε με σου λέω..! ΠΟΝΆΩ, ΑΦΙΣΕ ΜΕ ΝΑ ΦΎΓΩ – ΣΤΑΜΆΤΑ, ΜΕ ΠΟΝΑΣ ΣΟΥ ΛΈΩ, ΣΤΑΜΆΤΑ…

Και το πρόσωπο παραμορφώνεται, τα χαρακτηριστικά υποκύπτουν στην ψυχρότητα που δείχνει η φωτιά μπρος στην ευθραυσία της ανθρώπινης ζωής.

Το τέλος πλησιάζει…

- Pes sygnwmi – pes sygnwmi twra kai eisai lefteri – tha niwseis ton ilio na xaideuei ksana to kormi sou anti na to viazei, πες συγνώμη…

strifogyrizei… ta routhounia tis petane, to myalo tis se eksarsi, to kormi tis, mia teleutaia, tragiki prospatheia na parameinei mazi tis, na ekfrasei tis skepseis -

- gia tin zwi pou sou ‘dwsa? gia to νερό που σ’ αφησα να γευτείς? για το νέκταρ ή για το μέλι? συγνώμη για πιο απ’ όλα, Χάρυβδη?

Απάντησε μου τώρα σε παρακαλώ, ΣΥΓΝΏΜΗ ΓΙΑ ΠΙΟ Ε? ΓΙΑ ΠΙΟΟ??

Μια ολόκληρη ζωή.. ποτέ δεν σου έδωσα δικαίωμα, ΠΟΤΈ! – κι όμως, η καταδίκη σου σκληρή και τελεσίδικη, για κάτι που δεν έκανα – ΔΕΝ ΈΧΕΙΣ ΤΟ ΔΙΚΑΊΩΜΑ.. 

I apelpisia aylakwnei to proswpo tis, afinei aneksitila simadia pou omws tha xathoun stin prosexi katanalwsi tou swmatos -

-ΑΚΟΥΣ?? Πες μου, ΑΚΟΥΣ ΠΟΥ ΣΟΥ ΜΙΛΆΩ?

Apogoiteuei – to vlemma peftei, i kardia ragizei, χίλια κομμάτια – antio.

- Kalinixta glykia mou… argises, alla kalinixta…

Kai kathws to swma eliwne toso, ma toso aisthisiaka, kathws i fwtia katapine ta teleftaia apomeinaria zwis apo panw tis…

- ΣΥΓΝΩΜΗ..!

kai ta swmata enwnwntai, ginwntai ena stin apelpisia tou skotous kai tis fwtias, ginontai ena mes ton ilio pou katapinei axortaga -  katapinei  o,ti pio ανθρώπινο, ό,τι πιο αληθινό, και συνάμα ό,τι πιο ψεύτικο…

Καληνύχτα.

Afou apofasises na kleiseis tin porta sou, na sagineuseis kai meta na timwriseis opoion allo tolmise na piei ap’ tin glika sou, tote antio…

Ma otan niwseis ton aera na se dernei, otan o kosmos olos apofasisei na se xtipisei, na sou deiksei tin orgi tou, otan pia tha niwseis tin kakia, tin apogoiteusi, tin trela tou fantasmatos kai ton pono tou Orsino, na ksereis, i porta pou allote xtipouses to koudouni, etrexes k efeuges makria prin ypoxrewtheis – tha einai kleisti twra pia… opws kapote ekleises ki esi tin diki sou

Lypamai

A Stormy Sea, by Claude Monet

Kyma isouna, afros, stin akri tou xeiliou… kai to xrysopsaro n’ anoigokleinei synexeia to stoma, gyrevontas glykia anakoufisi – ant’ aftou, i idia almiri, esi, thalassa.

What if no-one, including me, does not grasp the meaning of my being?

What if I’m not sure whether or not i feel like i should?

What if the questions above can’t be answered?

What if, more to the point, the questions above are just questions for the sake of writing questions and are completely aimless and hollow – just something to occupy time and thinking for just one minute; if, that is, i’m lucky enough?

Would it matter for a second?

Would it make any difference?

Most probably not, since even if there is something more to what we’re living right now, even if there something more to your existence than just insignificant specks of what we call life – and that is only when we are happy or experience extreme unhappiness or any other feelings that shake the very foundations of our consciousness – you can never reach that more, you can never be that something besides your current, perhaps insignificant life specked, existence.

So shut up, stop questioning and start to experience as much as possible you can from this, get as much specks as to be able to claim that you have raised a fortune – then, perhaps, you have fulfilled that greater cause of existence; then, perhaps, you will become something more.

Red Light, Spherical Composition, 1923, by Ivan Kliun

25/05/08

Perpatoume stin pisw plevra tis paralias, 4 atoma. mia ginaika ki enas antras pairnoun dipla mas viastika, o antras na sprwxnei kai na odigei ti ginaika sto parking apenanti apo tin ethniki trapeza; i ginaika fovismeni, na prospathei na ksefigei me agkwnies, travigmata, dinatous psithirous.

Distazoume gia mia stigmi, apofasizoume na tous akolouthisoume sto telos (mpas kai tin paroume sto laimo mas tin xristiani). mpainoume loipon sto parking lot, o antras odigei tin ginaika se mia gwnia, emeis sinexizoume mexri to telos tou parking, (oi 2 filoi eutixws gnwstes polemikwn texnwn an xreiazotan o,tidipote). Emena ws sinithws me eixe arpaksei ena nevriko gelio, opws mou simvainei se kathe sovari peristasi, allwste, me apotelesma na pareksigoume apo autous pou den me gnwrizoun.

Meta apo 2-3 lepta entonis sinomilias, fwnes, apeiles ktl. apofasizoume na paroume tilefwno tin astinomia. Pairnw loipon to 11892 (pliroforeies katalogou), mou deinoun to tilefwno tis astinomias larnakos…

H sizitisi pou akolouthei metaksi emou kai tis tilefwnitrias einai pera ws pera alithini: (A: tilefwnitria, M: egw).

A: parakalw astinomia larnakas legete..

M: nai, eimaste se ena parking apenanti pou tin ethniki trapeza pisw pou tin paralia sti makariou, eshei ena antra pou efere mia ginaika dame, twra fwnazoun, i ginaika thelei na fiei, en tin afinei jinos.. mporeite na steilete kapoion?

A: ma sigoura? pou eisaste eipate?

M: nai afou en dame mrosta mas, eimaste se ena parking apenanti pou tin ethniki trapeza!

A: hmm ok, tha steilw kapoious

M: ligo grigora an ginetai sas parakalw

Pernoun 5 lepta, 10 lepta, tipote – sto metaksi i sizitisi twn dio eixe ginei pio viaii, o antras apeilouse tin kopella, ekeini zitouse na tin afisei na parei tilefwno apo kinito ekeinos arniotan.

Meta apo kanena tetarto, o antras eknevrizetai, afinei tin kopella na figei, ekeinos menei pisw sto parking. Akolouthoume tin kopella sto pezodromio, rwtoume an einai kala, tin vlepoume na mpainei se ena autokinito kai na fevgei.

Apofasizw na parw pisw tin astinomia:

A: parakalw astinomia larnakas legete..

M: nai, tilefwnisa prin pou kanena tetarto, gia ena antra pou apeilouse mia kopella..

A: nai, peste mou…

M: efie twra… en kala i kopella, o antras emeine pisw sto parking, en kserw ti kamnei

A: ok… pou eipate oti eisaste?

M: sto parking apenanti pou tin ethniki trapeza

A: a ok.. euxaristoume pou tilefwnisate

M: parakalw!

30/05/08

Pali katw paralia, kata tis 11 p.m., perpatoume sto pezodromio dipla apo tin ammo (osoi kseroun tis foinikoudes tha katalavoun). Vlepoume ena ploio sti thalassa, me mple fwta sta katartia tou, skafos diaskedasis prepei na itan. To miso ploio fainotan vithismeno, to ploio mallon vouliaze. Vlepame kai kati ploiarakia na pigenoerxontai apo kai pros to ploio… leme entaksei, to gnwrizoun oi arxes. Katsame loipon, meta apo kanena 15-lepto, stamatoun ta ploiarakia na pigenoerxontai, to ploio panta stin idia katastasi. Re mpas kai?

(I idia tilefwnitria)

A: parakalw astinomia larnakas, legete..

M: nai, eshei ena ploio je vithizetai dame! … en kserw an to kserete

A: MA POU EN TOUTI KOUVENTA???

(sto opoio simeio egw arxisa na gelw astamatita, kai me oti apothemata aera mou eixan apomeinei apantw)

M: eimaste dame apenanti pou to baileys…

Meta kati arxise na leei auti, apo to poli gelio den mporousa na tin akousw pleon, opote kai deinw to tilefwno se mia fili pou itan dipla na teleiwsoun tin sizitisi.

Teleiwnei to tilefwnima, mas leei i fili oti tin enimerwse i tilefwnitria oti kseroun ton arithmo pou pirame, an einai farsa tha mas paroun pisw kai tha exoume provlima – kati to opoio fisika apla mou prokalese perissotero gelio emena..

Pernoun kapou sta 5 lepta, erxete ena peripoliko me 2 neous astinomikous mesa, vgainoun, vlepoun to ploio, den mporoun na apofasisoun an vithizetai i oxi, opote arxizoun ta tilefwna, asirmatous ktl… meta apomenoun na vlepoun to ploio.

Emeis eprepe na figoume, eixame alloi ypoxrewsi, opote kai rwtw ton astinomiko:

M: telika vithizetai to ploio i lathos kaname pou tilefwnisame?

kai mou apanta autos, me ena plati xamogelo, les kai molis eixe teleiwsei apo sex kai eixe zisei ton entonotero orgasmo tis zwis tou:

A: vithizetai, vithizetai!..

M: ara emeis na figoume twra? (prospathontas na sigkratisw ta gelia mou)

A: nai.. na pate sto kalo… euxaristoume!

M: tipote, geia sas

Kai meta apo autes tis 2 eksexastes, kai entelws tragelafikes, gia mena katastaseis (enw mono komikes den einai, alla ti na kanw? den mporw kai na elegksw to gelio mou), dimiourgeitai i eksis evlogi, pistevw, aporia:

Astinomia einai auto, i to porneio tis madamme Ortance?

Creation of Coffee, by Karen Eland

Sunday night downtown… everyone and his mother is at a cafe tonight – they probably liked it when they came downtown yesterday to watch the eurovision… so they decided to do it again! and i’m sitting there sipping a cup of coffee, wondering, trying to understand why i do not share even a fragment of their enthusiasm; for my apathy for what surrounds me is growing, i get bored so very easily.

Desperately i seek a way out, trying to escape, to evolve to something more, but none i know is there, people seem to be involved in their own lives, leaving what they know in great pleasure, not ever looking for something more.

And this is the sad part… i don’t feel the same

Geopoliticus Child Watching the Birth of the New Man, by Salvador Dali

Will not bore you with the usual first post stuff – opened this blog just to post some thoughts, share some notions.

Welcome and i hope you enjoy this – had only been a blog reader up until now so i wonder how this is going to evolve..

Posts will be in both greek and english, depending on how i feel really… i hope i will be forgiven by those who cannot understand one of the two.

The actual post:

Yesterday’s conclusion of the day was that ungratefulness is worse than greed